Last year on this day, November 1st, I had finally taken the plunge and left my full time job. I felt relieved, excited, a little scared and overwhelmed all at the same time. On Halloween I finished my last day as a wine buyer for a large retail store here in New York, where I had been for nearly 2 1/2 years, and while it certainly wasn’t a bad job (come on, many people would die to have a job that requires you to taste hundreds of wines a month), I knew deep in my heart that I was meant for something else. I was simply out of place. Again.
On November 1st, 2015, many thoughts crept in, like “Will I be able to make a living off coaching people to better their lives?”, to “Where do I start?” to “Oh shit… I’m in charge now!!”… But overall, I was in a place where I really didn’t feel like I had a choice anymore. I was tired of telling myself no to opportunities that came up because I always had to be on somebody else’s schedule, I was tired of leaving my puppies for 10 hours a day, when all I really wanted was to work from home and spend more time with them, I was tired of being in a position where I was living below my potential and not able to utilize all my skills and interests and of course… I was desperate to feel passionate about what I was doing, to feel like I was contributing in the world, and like I was making a difference in somebody’s life.
For years I had been just falling into work that seemed like it could be a good fit me, without really examining whether or not that was true for me. I listened to other people’s opinions, and ignored my own. It looked good on the outside – and to be honest, I haven’t exactly had any ‘dud’ jobs at any part of my life; I started out in the music industry working as an international marketing and publicity director and traveled the world with rockstars (and a fair share of rappers!), I worked for a luxury vodka company from Scandinavia where I met a ton of fascinating people, had my own catering company where I had a chance to create some fabulous dishes and work with some really nice people and also of course lately, worked in the wine industry where I got to travel to many of the world’s vineyards and taste wine for a living. But what might seem perfect for others, may not be perfect for you. This is where the key lies. Not to get influenced by other people’s opinion, but finding the courage to go against what everyone else wants you to do, or tells you you ‘should’ do, if, at the end of the day, you are not madly in love with what you do.
Fast forward to today, November 1st, 2016, I sit here and think “oh my, what a difference a year makes!” Not only have I been able to make a living off coaching fabulous women all over the world who want the best out of life as well, but I have streamlined my activities to focus on what is important (a miracle for me who is a bit on the artistic side and like to deal with things at the spur of the moment), I get to spend every day with my fur babies and work from the comfort of my own home, and not have to endure a grueling commute every day and waste time being in a car, and I feel like what I do actually helps people and make them feel like they can do whatever they want to do too. Most importantly – I can finally be ME! Unapologetically, without having to fit into any type of mold, I can do whatever I want to do, say whatever I want to say, and work with whoever I want to work with. Sure, there might be a couple of things in my business I’m not jumping up and down to do, but because I have a clear sense of WHY I’m doing what I’m doing and what my ultimate goal is, I gladly do them because at the end of the day they allow me to live a life that finally is in alignment with my values and with my personality. Having a purpose for why you do things in life, is key to everything.
Another miraculous thing happens too when you open yourself up to be the best version of yourself. You start attracting other like minded people into your life like yourself, who inspire you, show you what’s possible and open up a whole new world of opportunities for you. I am currently finishing up a year long coaching and business certification program where I have gained 250 new girl friends, talented, ambitious and successful women all around the globe who have the same mission as I do: to be of service and to do something meaningful with their lives. These women are supportive, lift me up and encourage me on a daily basis. They want the best for me, because they themselves have found happiness so they can genuinely feel happy for me, in return. That’s what happens when you follow your heart and go for what sets your soul on fire. These women have such a positive influences on me, I sometimes wonder how I got so lucky and how I existed without this support system. But everything happens in its own time, and it happened to me this year because I was finally READY.
Now, I will not pretend that it all has been a smooth journey and that I haven’t had days where I found things challenging, a little scary and unsettling, because let’s face it – as a new entrepreneur when you are just starting to set up your systems and get familiar with your new way of life and of doing business, you don’t really know what your next month will look like. But I decided that certainty was boring, and it was killing my soul because again – I wasn’t allowed to really utilize all that I had to give. So I traded certainty for passion. That, is what living is to me. I will choose passion and happiness any day over certainty, mediocrity and having a “decent” life. Because I know great is within reach for all of us!
There is such enormous freedom in knowing that I, and only I, am in charge of my life, and I have the power to change things I don’t like or am not happy with. There is nobody else to blame or complain about, which is probably one of the best things having chosen this way of life for myself. I hated feeling like I was giving away my power when I was pointing at other people for the problems or tough days I was going through. As if they were in charge of my day or my life, and that I had to just comply, or else… Like being in a prison!! I now know that the only person I should be pointing at is myself. If something is not working 100% the way I want to, I examine it, put more work in or revise what I’m doing. This always works, because I never quit, I keep going because I know I will eventually succeed. Having an unwavering belief in yourself is crucial when choosing a passion based life.
There is so much personal growth that goes on when you choose yourself, whether it is choosing to go into business for yourself, choosing to believe that you deserve that raise, that loving relationship, or even those extra few hours a week where you only focus on yourself and take care of you. Ultimately, when you have an inner voice that tells you “I deserve more”, it’s there for a reason. Don’t ignore it. When you start listening to it and respecting that voice, you are respecting yourself, and in turn – other people will start respecting you as well and you will get what you want and need in life. This is how the Universe works.
Take it from me: it feels SO good to take a chance on yourself and finally make the best out of this one life we’ve been given. If you know what I’m talking about, wonderful, and I’m so happy for you! If not, why not decide to choose to believe that you can do whatever you put your mind to and see what happens?! Most often we end up astounding ourselves. Get in touch with me if you think I could support you – [email protected] or check out my website for more information at sunnygandara.com. I believe in you!!